Step Away

 September 30, 2025

Sometimes we look inwardly and focus on getting ourselves together. Some of us are privileged to have self-awareness that the conflicts you experience with others are not because of anyone other than us. Sometimes WE are the problem. And those conflicts cannot go away if we are not making time to improve. If this is you, we gotta identify the barriers we create, examine the impact, and determine possible sources of conflicts. And if you cannot be the source of the resolution you gotta be humble enough to find resources beyond you. You don't have to have all the answers to the problems in your life. You do have to be realistic enough about needing help. If that's the case for you, make the necessary changes to improve your relationships with others.

In other situations, you gotta step away because you need to go deep. There is a book called Deep Work (2016) by Cal Newport. What is deep work? Deep work is when you have the mindset in the effort to just focus on one thing…one big goal, and NOT multitasking to get it done. People talk about being committed to something and getting something done. Sadly, many people aren't really ready to do it because they don't understand or they refuse to accept the work needed to make it happen. Some musical artists have to go away when they're working on their music. They can't be bothered, they gotta be focused. They can't let anything else distract them. Deep work means being really committed to the project and giving it time in concentration.

To me, it means barricading myself in a room, all of my snacks and everything that I need to get to work. This allows me to get into the zone and get the work done. I know if I’m not intentional with the big projects, they will remain just ideas. They will be part of my idea graveyard that is full of goals that will remain indefinitely incomplete…a what-if that will remain a what-if…I don’t like leaving missions incomplete. So, that means there are times I gotta step away, please don't take it personally. It's not you, it's me!

Make a way to do the deep work

Everyone you know may not understand your reasons for stepping away and that's okay. They are not you. They may not know what is required to do what you need to do, so that you can get to a place where you can thrive…to get to a place where simply surviving is not the end goal. The journey might not be easy. It's probably going to be a lot of unexpected roadblocks in your journey to get to the place you need to be, but don't be discouraged, stay focused and get it done. I'll see you on the other side!

 

Your fan,
Elgrie J.